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How can I help my teenager fulfil his/her own potential?

“I feel terribly conflicted. On the one hand, I think I should just sit back and let my son and daughter go off and do their own thing. By this, however, I mean to give them opportunities. How and what they do with these opportunities is their decision, not mine. On the other hand, it drives me up a wall when I see talents in my son that are being wasted. He has so many skills.”
“It’s all fine and good when so called experts talk about not overdoing directions, Parental pressures and demands, but let’s face it, this is not the same world as it was years ago. Kids need to develop skills in this day and age.”
Every teenager is unique. What works better for any given child or parent may be completely inappropriate for another teenager. You will have to judge your particular circumstances. However, despite all the enormous individual differences, here are few important suggestions.
Do not project your own goals onto your children.
Provide opportunities for teenagers to pursue and develop their own talents.
Be an appreciative audience. Reward but do not buy performance. Develop “intrinsic reward of the activity.”
Watch out for signs of trouble regarding pressure.
Try not to fall into an evaluative mode.
Help your teenager be realistic about goals.
Never, never compare your adolescent to other adolescents or to yourself as a teenager.
Do whatever you can to encourage your adolescent to discover his or her own particular talents and to set achievement goals that fits these talents.

...Listen more than talk...

...Encourage more than direct...

...Inform but don’t evaluate...